My mind has been a mashed up conglomeration of memories, my emotions a slow and pretty swirl of bright colors. I want to write about them all, go back and clarify them all, make sure no one who would read here is misunderstanding. I can’t do all that. So I keep documenting the journey in the hours that come, the moments that come, the stretches of time when I am home enough to write.

I will say that I somehow kind of forgot that most major life changes include a time of transition. In my mind I went from thriving here to hopefully thriving there with nothing too significant or hard in-between. My purpose in writing certain things down is not to drag other people into my drama. Nor is it to tell of our past family struggles. But this is the life I am living, a life that daily includes other people.

A part of being a family in Christ is that we wouldn’t go through our struggles alone. Yes my kids are my kids and my husband is my husband, but they are also a part of my family in Christ, a family that I have been part of for much, much longer. If things were up to me I’d keep grasping for pleasures and insisting that all we needed were hacks to bring happiness. Heaven really will be better than this.