I don’t know if there were more leaves on the trees this year or what but it seems like the ground is just covered with them right now. I don’t remember ever seeing them this thick before to where it might has well be snow that has fallen. I played some Christmas music this morning–not the obnoxious kind. The kids noticed and thought it was still too early. Do they not remember? Come mid-November, it was time for Christmas music and decorating the school room.

Our new hire training finished up this afternoon. I don’t need to worry about it now for over a month. Not much has changed that I can tell so far. I don’t know what it is about healthcare professionals, but there seems to be this universal thing where we are notorious for taking poor care of ourselves. You would think nurses especially would not have this problem. But right before break the instructor announced that she just remembered she hadn’t peed yet today.

That’s a mild example. You become so used to having your hands and body in other people’s body fluids that it’s not big deal to speak of your own. When I would do 12-hour training shifts in St. Louis, I prided myself on how I could go the whole shift without peeing. It seemed like kind of a rock-star skill that even after giving birth I still pretty much had an iron bladder. It seems so stupid to me now. When you have to go you just go, no holding it for ungodly amounts of hours.

But none of it was conscious. You just didn’t stop, and when you did sit down for lunch, it wasn’t for very long. It almost felt wrong to eat. When we toured the floors yesterday sometime past two, both the daytime nurses were eating their lunch. “Of course you caught me after I just sat down”, one said. No one was judging. I don’t think it’ll be that busy of a place. It always thought it was weird to see staff members. I did it, but not at the nurses desk. You went into the back to have privacy.

I think it’s more of a thing people talk about now. I know I for one am much more aware of my own body. For a while I’ve wondered how women who work full-time make it through the day without the chance to take a nap. Now I know. They just talk about it from after lunch onward of how tired they are and how much they need a nap. We walk to the juice bar and get something to drink. It made me feel better to know they got tired. I still do wonder about Taylor Swift and her rain shows.