The boys are away at camp this week. Whenever I miss my time in the morning to write I can’t help but try to get it done a little later, even while contending with the sounds of opening doors and footsteps and coughs. The inner pain of needing to write even with so many noises around me and the tasks of the day calling out for my attention is enough to bring me to almost tears sometimes. It’s kind of ridiculous, but you know.

That’s just the way it is sometimes. My project for the week is cleaning out Ethan’s room. Then whenever we find out the moving day in July his stuff will be ready to pick and choose what he wants. My sister is helping design a wedding rehearsal invitation and I’m determined to keep finding at least one thing every day. Something that needs to be done that I can do. Over the weekend Laura and I made her chapel decoration

for the outdoor chapel cross. She’s such a sweetie. This past Friday my sister-in-law took the day off work and had me come down to St. Louis where she helped me find a dress. I found a few other ones as well to buy and put into my 40+ wardrobe stash. I was so amazed by the selection down there that I might even go back and shop there again sometime. It’s a big enough city that they still have department stores in their malls.

My brother asked me to go with him to a college day today and I told him no. That was rough because I would’ve wanted to do it but I have a child I am needing to take to the doctor and a mind that is needing to stay focused on life. I’m feeling exposed again and vulnerable, like I’m needing to be careful and treat myself gently. There’s some issue going on with the teachers right now where they’re looking into the messaging policies.

I gave out my phone number to the three of my clients and apparently this can be a huge risk to my safety. Sometimes I think people take things too far. These people are supposed to trust us but we are apparently not supposed to trust them. The leaves look pretty today and I’ve been drinking lemon water to hopefully reduce inflammation in my face and elsewhere. It’s all so silly. But yeah, I need to get started on my work now.