I have been in a funk since the previous weekend. The Katrina thing affected me in ways I did not expect it to. There were other things going on, but that kind of tipped things over the edge so to speak. It opened up a grief window that has made me sensitive to old losses and my dreams have been more vivid since she left. Last night (from when I write) I had a dream that he was next door in the CGC for a retreat. I wondered if he would be thinking of me knowing I was so close.

So I walked over to find him. I saw him at the end of the hallway and he also saw me. I thought dear God, finally. We embraced a long time and that was all that needed to happen. After that I woke up. The night before (Friday) was the Lutheran High dinner auction. Camp had sponsored a table so we had seats to fill. Lauren and her Dad were there. Miles’ parents were there. Josh and I were there and then Laura’s Dad also came and sat with us. Her mom was away for a bridal shower.

The boys had a meet in Mt. Zion but we did not go to this one. I ended up going for a 20 minute walk in the hallway to ease the soreness in my back. Somehow the live auction went very quickly and before I knew it people were standing up to leave. Miles mom was telling me about her teaching job at the high school and how difficult it can be on hard days but so rewarding on good days. Overall I was to have pushed through and went. We didn’t buy anything and that was perfectly okay.