The first thing she asked me when I walked in the door is if I’d be interested in a trauma-informed yoga class starting up at the counseling center. This wasn’t a chaotic wind kind of day. I haven’t been feeling the greatest and have also been experiencing more anxiety again, the kind where my leg muscles spasm and my hips wobble when I’m sitting up straight and breathing out. I had actually planned to ask her if I could sit on the floor so I could do some of my yoga stretches, which I haven’t been doing as regularly these past months. I am not as dedicated with it when I’m feeling better.
I told her I was absolutely interested. I’ll have to consider it more to decide whether or not it’s doable with our family schedule. We’ve got another four weeks of Monday night classes before breaking for summer. After Easter we’ve got a 13-week GriefShare group starting at our church, which I’m helping to facilitate with our DCE on Wednesday evenings. The yoga class starts at the end of April and would be on Thursday evenings. The kids still have games and meets through most of May, including one tonight which I’m currently home from. I thought I was going to try to go, but I decided to stay home.
Not that I don’t love my kids or want to be there for them. I likely would be there if I didn’t have a paper I needed to finish by tonight. It’s only five pages, and I’ve got a good portion of the process done, I just need to finish saying what I need to say and writing what I need to write. I tried a different strategy this time. Instead of procrastinating and thinking about it for weeks, I procrastinated on purpose, but without thinking about it or intending to work on it until yesterday. My plan was to get up early and just start “angrily typing the damn thing”. I wouldn’t want to wait and do that with a longer paper, but for this one it worked well enough to get the job done.