Today was an overall good day. It started out very early when I could not sleep past 3am. I was in the mood to write but I had already written here. So I got up and wrote Josh a letter since he has written me several things lately including typing out 23 strips of paper for our anniversary that he wrote on gave me for 23 days. I basically just typed till I filled a page. You’re supposed to direct your energy back into the relationship whenever it’s been closed off or unused or being put in wrong places.

It’s good to have those refreshers and tune-ups. After that I drafted an email that I decided later in the morning I will never send. You basically get a once in a lifetime chance to be a screwup and after that you just don’t have the same excuses. You have a little more insight into how things go and how your own brain works. And you just have to believe people when they tell you that something is not a good idea, no matter how much they may or may not understand. I don’t know why it’s so hard.

My craziness is not for everyone is what I’m saying. I’m sorry it had to be for anyone. So then I got most of my modules done to where I could come home and finish the videos and test after work. I had a really nice work day with all individuals who I really enjoy seeing. Tomorrow is more couples, an individual, plus a new family intake. Laura sent a video of Lila this evening of Ethan reading math gibberish to her as a bedtime story. She smiles more now and I told everyone she understands him.